Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Doing The Best I Can

I hadn't planned on posting this week as between my test tonight, planning a Thanksgiving dinner yesterday, a new research project, and finalizing my plans for this weekend, I've been stretched a wee bit thin. However I felt I should share something with y'all.

Allow me to admit something, I have bouts of pretty low self-esteem. Which means that I have trouble believing people when they say good things about me. I'm better about it than I used to be, but I can never be called egotistical.

After our mini-Thanksgiving; me, Eva, and Daybreak were on her couch under a blanket. Daybreak had fallen asleep sitting on my lap while me and Eva were talking quietly. I never realized I was doing it but I had started stroking Daybreak's hair and humming.

Eva just watched me, smiling.

Me: What is it?
Eva: Just enjoying the scene.
Me: What scene?
Eva: You and Daybreak.
Me: I'm still lost here.
Eva: You are very good with her for someone who thinks he would be a horrible dad.
Me: She deserves a better one.
Eva: In her eyes, there couldn't be a better one. And I'm starting to agree with her.

6 comments:

  1. It's hard sometimes. I understand completely; I have a hard time accepting when someone says something positive about me. Sometimes, you have to take a step back and realize that a whole bunch of people see you in the opposite way you see yourself; there's usually a good reason for that.
    :)

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  2. You're right, or Eva's right - no matter what you do, you will be infallible in your kid's eyes for a very, very long time. It's kind of cool: they believe before we do. You know?

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  3. I know it can be hard to hear nice things said about you sometimes. It's like that old joke about not wanting to belong to a club that would have you as a member: you know all your faults and flaws so it's hard to imagine other people not seeing you all flawed and faulty the way you do. But, as I've noted before, Daybreak knows what's up. Sounds as though Eva does, too. Nice.

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  4. Being completely objective over here: you're doing a damn good job.

    Really.

    I'm so blessed that you led me to your blog... Go have a deliciously satisfying day, okay?

    xo

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  5. I think you're doing an amazing job as well.

    Happy Thanksgiving!

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  6. Sounds like you would be an awesome father, you already are. Just ask Daybreak. Happy Thanksgiving! :)

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